Another big break between posts and another adventure to tell you about. This trip was a lot more relaxed than my previous trips, but every bit as enjoyable. The whole week was just perfect because I've never seen my little boy so happy.
Tyler has a few issues with communication and social skills. For over a year now I've known that there was something not quite right, but everyone told me that it was just a phase or things would develop when he was ready. But at 27 months, Tyler still does not speak, not even to call me Mamma (though that is getting better). Tyler babbles in his own language, but does not communicate his wants or needs easily. Sometimes it is literally like having a newborn, especially when he has a meltdown and it's a guessing game as to what is wrong. There's a lot more to it, and it can be very difficult at times, especially because we don't know what's causing it. One possible diagnosis is Autism, but we can not get a formal diagnosis until he is atleast two and a half. Until he gets his formal diagnosis he can not get any therapy apart from speech therapy, which is pretty much useless.
The reason I'm telling you this is so you get an idea of just how amazing this holiday was for my baby boy. He literally thrived! I can honestly say I've never seen him so happy and he even attempted to interact with other children. It was difficult for him because he couldn't communicate with them so he just followed them around, but for him that's a massive step. He also didn't have any meltdowns after the second day. To go even one day without a meltdown is normally an achievement, so to go 5 and be ok on the plane is amazing.
To be able to relax with Tyler and see him so happy gave me so much joy. I'm going to be honest, because I'm sure there are a lot of people in a similar situation. Since we've started the process of diagnosis and Tyler's issues have come more to the fore, I have struggled with the prospect that Tyler could have a lifelong condition. To be responsible for a child is a huge thing to deal with, but to deal with the fact your child may always struggle is even harder. It made me angry, sad, bitter and every emotion in between. Why does my little boy have to deal with this? Why can't he just speak? I just wanted him to call me Mamma and give me cuddles without having to ask. I wanted to see him play with other kids; to laugh, shout and be a boisterous little boy.
On holiday I saw a glimpse of him trying, which filled me with so much hope. More than that though, I realised how lucky I am. He may be different to other kids, but that's not a bad thing. When most kids were running about and causing mischief, Tyler was happy to sit and play quietly. Whilst most kids got bored with a toy or a game after a short time, Tyler was content to play the same game over and over again. Whilst most kids would run away from their parents, Tyler would always keep me in his sight. Tyler is different, but he is just fantastic.
I could write a lengthy blog about the hotel, what I wore, the weather, but for me the holiday was not about any of that stuff. It was about my brilliant boy and seeing him shine like the little star that he is!! I don't think that you could ask for any more in a holiday!!